7 Reasons why China Will Do Well in Cricket

1. First and foremost, they would have the largest gathering of Chinaman bowlers, beat that!

2. Javed Miandad has been teaching them cricket ethics and spirit of the game;

3. China possess a wall more impregnable than Rahul Dravid;

4. Ages of ping-pong practice means even their No. 11 batter would have the sharp hand-eye coordination of a Sehwag;

5. The outside world would have to depend solely on Xinhua for results, which effectively means the world would know only what the on-duty Xinhua editor wants it to know;

6. Cheap Chinese products would be a serious distraction for tourists, especially when fielding. Plans are afoot to set up boundary line kiosks in all major stadiums;

7. I have been to Beijing Olympics and can tell you that China can both prevent and make rain. So while a Dhoni or a Ponting, at best, can pray for rain, their Chinese counterpart would have access to a technology which would be handy on the fifth day of a precarious Test.

Live from Mohali

Welcome to What Neo Won't Show And Cricinfo Won't Report.

1410: Dhoni wins toss. Ponting inquires if Amitabh Bachchan had used the same coin in 'Sholay'. Umpire Ashoka de Silva grumbled 'Sholay' was never screened in Sri Lanka and hence he could not shed any light on it.

1430: Harbhajan shakes hand with Ashoka de Silva like long lost mate. Staying with Bhajji, I suspect he is subdued in this series because Chris Broad is the Match Referee. The same guy -- no doubt he hides a pair of horns under that trendy cap -- who had reported Bhajji twice in the past. Come on Chris, live upto your name -- surname to be precise -- and take a broad view of things. My heart bleeds for Bhajji since we are the last few remaining Doosra exponents.

1440: Statying with Chris, I think Stuart Little got the surname alright but goofed up the name when he complained to Pa that a neighbourhood Singh boy had hit him for six sixes. That was Yuvi, not Harbhajan, Chris. Stop scaring the kid.

1545: Sorry for the delay. The wi-fi in the press box is like Australian opening pair. Just not working.

1610: Raina in pain, trying to stop a ball that gets sandwiched between him and the turf. Looked like he was trying to sow the ball and maybe water it as well till it bore fruit. Balls I meant.

1645: Hear it here FIRST. BCCI Prez Shashank Manohar tells PCB chief Ejaj Butt -- both are here -- that no Ind-Pak series possible in the next 8 months. Promises to renew talk next year, provided the Government gives them the go-ahead.

1820: Australia settle for 250 when 300 looked a possibility. Something fairly akin to dating Katrina Kaif and then settling for/with Rakhi Sawant. Destiny, I guess.

2010: Ashoka de Silva just topped every Indian hate-list and his family would pray hard for his safe return after that howler of a decision against Tendulkar.

2025: Son of the soil Yuvraj clearly knows part of the crowd moving behind the sightscreen. You don't need lip-readers to tell you that he was referring to some of their mothers and sisters.

2030: India reach 111 for 3 in 22.4 overs. I'm missing David Shepherd (read my tribute here).

2121: Suddenly it springs to my mind - I have seen grandpa and grandson bat together in an ODI when Tendulkar and Yuvraj forged a brief partnership. And Yuvraj isn't alone to call Tendulkar grandpa.

2137: Today must be International Party-Pooper's Day. First Sehwag spoiled birthday boy Mitchell Johnson's party and then de Silva marred Tendulkar's.

2230: No more updates today, time for other serious stuff. Thanks for staying with Doosra, if anyone that is :)

Doosra live from Kotla

Welcome to WNWSACWR. What Neo Won't Show And Cricinfo Won't Report, for the uninitiated.

2210: Dhoni and Henriques try to run through each other and come crashing down. Both believe the other guy goofed up the mantra.

2150: Had they been in the press box, a handful of Australian cricketers would either have contemplated homicide or quit the game altogether hearing the way their names were being molested by the official scorer. See if you know Dog Bolllinger, Adam Bhaujee, Peter Seed Le, and Nathan Harish.

2130: Yuvraj hits Henriques for an effortless six. It looked a fullish delivery but replays showed it was a foolish delivery.

2115: Dhoni changes gloves and Doug Bollinger uses the time to rub the ball furiously against his thigh. Doosra has raised it in the past also that ICC should do something for dermatosis among players.

1930: Sorry for the prolonged delay. Had other fishes to fry. BTW, the Tata Stand, from where Johnson is trying to decapitate Dhoni, has Hema Malini selling purified water on one side and Tendulkar peddling cement on the other. It gets too boring, so here goes a PJ, the copyright of which belongs strictly to Doosra. Q. Which place in India is named after Hema Malini's brother? Ans. Dharamshala. (More PJs if Dhoni and Yuvraj don't end the boredom.)

1645: Ponting just raised the bar in self-abuse after his dismissal and you don't need lip-readers to tell you that he capped the line with the most popular four words in the history of human civilisation. In fact he was so loud that the thunder could be heard in Tasmania, if they strain their ears a little.

1555: Gambhir literally has a pain in the neck, just copped a Ponting pull. Shame on you Punter. Be a man, play fair and square.

1545: Babes with bottles enter the field with Foster's refreshment. Foster daughters indeed, one would assume. You don't send out your own daughter in such sartorial scantiness.

1445: Surprise! Surprise! Ponting opens with Watson. But then for someone who has uncorked zillion bubblies in his pomp, opening comes spontaneously.

1428: Both teams observe a minute's silence in David Shepherd's memory. You kind of agree, this is how Harbahjan looks best, lips sealed.

1425: Who says Ind-Pak cricket ties have been knotted, I mean snapped? Before the Men in Blue and Canary Yellow walk out, the ground has been invaded by the Men in Green. Alas, they turn out to be mere groundsmen. The same bunch of souls who top Ponting's hit/hate-list for watering the practice pitch yesterday.

Ind vs Oz...Day 5

1513: 91 minutes and 18.4 overs and nothing to live update! It's all over, covers are off, they are sprinkling water on the 22-yard that was the centrestage of the drama that lasted a little over four days.

Ponting admitted Australia are not accustomed to leading 0-1 in a Test series. And that they are not accustomed to be beaten like this. And that there is no rift between him and Brett Lee.

1525: Zaheer, meanwhile, is busy attending the hearing after charged for an assortment of Level II offences -- over-appealing, over-celebrating 9after Hayden's dismissal), over-chatting and other overdeeds.

1530: Indian team disperses and will re-assemble on 26th. Ponting wants two day's introspection break.

Worst defeat of his career? "Possibly", says Punter.

1535: Dhoni has that midas touch, everything he touches turns gold. I think reason enough and time ripe to replace P Chidambaram. Anyone at 10, Janpath listening?

Ind vs Oz...Day 4

1003: After Haddin and Hayden grassed and Ponting leaked, Australian are suddenly making atonements by throwing themselves around. Suddenly they realise it's the cricket board which takes care of their laundry bills!

1108: Drooping shoulder, increasing frustration. Ponting finally injects some life and brings in Mike Hussey to roll his arm over. Last time Hussey was seen bowling was when Hillary Clinton was running for the US Prez's post, Yuvraj Singh was dating Deepika Padukone and Ms Padukone was not dating Ranbir Kapoor.

1315: India leading by 510 runs and Dhoni still not declaring. Needs to give bowlers time to bowl out the Ozzies. I think he is overestimating his bowling unit and underestimating Ponting and party.

1324: In between his attemps to halve the ball into two, Dhoni the Woodcutter was experimenting with a different scoop shot. So far we have seen the scoop famously bungled by Misbah which takes the fine leg route. Here, Dhoni was trying to scoop whatever White hurled at him to the third man area! Indigenous indeed but success still Dhoni.

Ind vs Oz...Day 1

0930: Welcome to WNWSACWR, in other words, What Neo Won't Show And Cricinfo Won't Report.

0940: Peter Siddle just sent down his first delivery in Test cricket, which reared off like an ill-tempered mule and whacked Gambhir on the helmet. Gambhir apparently has not lost his memory and recognises Sehwag. Sigh of relief across the stadium.

1021: The nearest cricket stadium was some 700km away. So my entire childhood was intrigued by the curiosity to know what players did during the over breaks. Finally, I arrived at my own conclusion that everyone stood still and were allowed to move only when broadcast resumed. It was a shock of my life when I saw them actually moving in front of my eyes during those breaks.

1027: Siddle is bowling from media end and the sightscreen behind Haddin displays a general insurance advertisement with the punchline 'Muskurate Raho'. Well, it's asking for too much, especially when you are hit around the park. At best, Siddle can only grin and bear it.

1039: Brett Lee, India's ambassador to Australia and son of the Mohali soil in IPL, greeted media with a chaste 'Sat Sri Akaal' on Wednesday. Siddle believes otherwise and welcomed Gambhir with a whack on the helmet this morning. Sehwag greets Watson with a boundary. Diwali greetings all around.

1054: The presence of Peter Roebuck in the press box puts me in August company this October 17. Tall man, taller nose (pardon my journalistic exaggeration. A journalist sans exaggeration is SRK minus stammering or spreading of his arms, whatever you like). His trademark sun hat lying on his desk, besides the laptop which he assaulted to pen this nice piece on Tendulkar. Wanted to talk to him but do I really fancy meeting someone who drove Richards and Garner out of Somerset and was jailed for caning three wards? Maybe some other day.

1104: With the Oz attack looking as toothless as the lady who played Indira Thakrun in Satyajit Ray's masterpiece "Pather Panchali", this is the only way they can hope to get Indian wickets. Gambhir and Dravid in an almighty mix-up but fortunately there's no damage. It turned out Gambhir was calling in Punjabi and Dravid was responding in Kannada. I always felt Indian cricket is in badly need of a lingua franca.

1222: The brand new car (I'm not paid, why should I mention the brand?) is perched on the edge of the boundary ropes under a harsh sun. I guess by the end of the fifth day, it would simply evaporate. Friends here are not amused by my thoughts and attribute the perceived banality to the vile lunch we had here. Thanks to the largesse of an Oz company (same reason for not naming them), my peers have turned beer barrels.

1248: After Siddle aimed at his head, Gambhir this time had a full-blooded Ponting throw hit his calf muscle. He clearly has reasons to fear for his life and limb. Hope Gambhir has got his insurance papers right.

1303: So far, Brett Lee has been as effective as Gandhism on gangsters. Imps insist Ponting needs to get Preity Zinta here to hug Lee. Well, I have nothing to say on this issue. I mean, why gild the Lillee...err...lily?

1326: Well, well. They just showed a Preity Zinta poster and Lee removed Dravid! That should be enough to establish the infallibility of my theory and silence the Doubting Thomas.

1444: Peter Siddle just made history by sending down the first ball in the post-tea session. Tendulkar glided it to third man, ran three and the bar was set higher for posterity. Brian Lara, just pushed off the pedestal, must be texting his congratulatory message in his palatial mansion at Trinidad's capital. Take a bow sir.

2009: Talk about controlled aggression.

"I have been around for 19 years and all these 19 years I did not play to prove anything to anyone, not in my first year not in the 10th, 15th or 19th year...I'm not here to react to what X,Y,Z is writing about me or saying about me. People will say lot of things, not necessarily they are always correct. I don't take their opinions seriously. ...so many things are being said and written and not necessarily those are right. Those are only opinions. What I feel within is more important. People tend to give opinion about what's going in my mind, so I don't know how they can figure out what's going in my mind, which is something even I can't figure out at times...As long as I enjoy I'll play. I don't need X,Y,Z to tell me when I should stop or when I should continue. When I stared, no one told me you should start or you should continue, so nobody needs to tell me now either."

I have never seen anyone masking his aggression better. In the press conference, it was Tendulkar all the way.

Oz vs BP XI...Day Three

1000: Chawla and Ojha tweaking Oz tail. The damage is more than just their bowling figures. I think Punter & Party would go into the Test series with mauled minds and battered confidence. Kumble surely owes a drink to the spin twin. For the Ozzies, they are trembling in their boot, looking as comfortable as someone whose hands are tied with a colony of cockroaches marching over him.

1136: I think speculation should be put to rest about who should open with Hayden in Bangalore. Neither Jaques, nor Katich but Stuart Clark. Come on, he looked better than most. And opening means he would have longer rest before he comes out to bowl. Hope Nielsen reads Doosra.

1516: Badri just got out in a manner that would haunt him for a while. Lee banged it short and wide and Badri had no business chasing it. He was on his toes, I mean literally, and looked like was searching for something to hang his bat on. Walking is fine but after you are picked in the Test squads, scores of 2 and 14 only jeopardises your chances of getting into playing XI.

Oz vs BP XI...Day Two

1026: Protege Pathan must be giving Guru Greg a reason to feel vindicated. Oz attack banging head against brickwall to polish the BP tail. I can see Kumble grinning. Pathan almost exhausted all his luck today before Clark saw his back.

1051: Just witnessed the Sidhu-made-famous Rajendra Talkies cycle stand of Patiala here in Uppal. The same batsmen who were swatting whatever the Aussies hurled at them suddenly looked in a hurry to return to the hut's comfort. The 500-mark looked well within reach before the collapse in heap.

1148: A number of times, Sunny Gavaskar spoke of how umpires made it Australian XIII Down Under. On the other extreme is Shavir Tarapore. BP XI got a couple of bad LBW decisions y'day and now Tarapore turned down Gony's appeal against Hayden. The ball pitched on stumps, rapped him right in front and no movement whatsoever. Can we please cut down on this kind of hospitality for visitors, please?

1247: Just saw Katich saying something to Pragyan Ojha. I have a sneaking suspicion, he was trying to convince Ojha to migrate to Australia. Does the ICC rule book empowers umpires to curb spin trafficking?

1256: To my horror, Piyush Chawla was talking to Ricky Ponting. Hope he didn't say 'I'm readymade..I mean..ready mate.' Anyway from BCCI watching?

1500: Oz bowling looked mediocre and now their batters seem vulnerable. Chawla tormented Ponting before Punter decided offence is the best defence. Except Hussey to some extent, none could really read Chawla. And this is not the free-scoring Aussie side you know. Kumble's grin widening.

Welcome to Cricket Inc, and that’s the way out gentlemen

# Australian players yet to see the money they were promised
# Kolkata Knight Riders shows the door to five players
# Royal Challengers Bangalore jettisons Charu Sharma
# Team Mohali asks fringe players to shift to less-opulent hotels

Well, I don’t expect foreign imports to be jolted out of their illusion of a dollar deluge yet. But by now, some of them must have regained enough sense to realize that the Indian Premier League is not exactly the El Dorado.

But to be honest, they are not the only ones who felt the moneybag franchise owners have ankle-deep pockets. So did we. And some of the players clearly saw only the chequebook on one hand of their owner, completely overlooking the whip on the other. Suddenly, quite a handful of them have been driven out of their comfort zone.

Welcome to Cricket Inc. Perform of perish.

Behind her bubbly eyes, Preity Zinta is as much an entrepreneur as her thoroughbred fiancé; beneath the veneer of his charm, Shah Rukh Khan is a fierce salesman who has succeeded in monetizing a dimpled smile; and for the Ambanis and Mallyas – they have been schooled to believe that loss is essentially a four-letter word, which also happens to be the eighth deadly sin.

With IPL reaching its business end, and this is the apt phrase, now it’s clearly showing who’s the boss. With Charu Sharma went out a clear message for Dravid, Kallis, Ponting, Laxman as well as Cheteshwar Pujara and Ranadeb Bose. It’s out and out a cut-throat business proposition. No wonder, Shah Rukh is dealing in flying kisses these days, and Preity in hugs. Mallya apparently doesn’t care a hoot for niceties and Ambani does not think it worth making an appearance in the venues. Wife Nita, no wonder she handles charitable arm of Reliance industries, is representing the family these days.

Well guys, welcome to Cricket Inc. and that is the way out. Thank you very much.

IPL: Cricket Sans Frontiers

In another world, Ricky Ponting revealing Matthew Hayden’s only chink in the armour to Ashok Dinda could have amounted to treason. Likewise, AB de Villiers tipping off Sehwag on what snaps Dale Steyn’s rhythm could have been a perfect ground to make a Quisling out of the Protea bat.

Thanks to IPL, border – those haphazard scratches on Earth’s lovely round face- stands, if at all, blurred.

I had gone for Delhi Daredevils' practice session yesterday where TA Sekar, AB de Villiers, Rajat Bhatia and Manoj Tiwary were available for media interaction.

Sekar spoke in details how McGrath was mentoring the likes of V Yomahesh, Pradeep Sangwan and even Ferveez Maharoof, teaching them tricks of the trade and secrets of the craft which he learned during the course of his illustrious career.

Sekar said

If you saw the last match, you would remember how McGrath was trying to cool Maharoof who was getting some stick.

de Villiers too made it clear that he would not have any qualms sharing secrets about how to blunt Steyn.

He said

I’m more than willing to discuss the strength and weaknesses of the South African players. I would love to do everything that gives us an edge.

Lambasting IPL is a cottage industry among purists. I too had my fair share of potshots at it, even though I’m neither purists, nor the hoi polloi. But the peep into Delhi Daredevils camp came as a complete eye-opener. IPL has not bowled me over yet but I have to admit that it’s a paradigm shift indeed.

Gilly ready to sledge Punter

Those who thought it’s only politics which makes strange bedfellows, time to get their basics right. So does the Indian Premier League (IPL). Here friends turn foe and hatchets are hurriedly buried for six weeks, as if they didn't exist. In fact, Shane Warne and Graeme Smith would soon take their position next to the wicketkeeper to feature in cricket’s own ‘Slipping With the Enemy’.

Thanks to Lalit Modi, here you have a unique world where Bush hugs Osama, Hillary hosts Obama and China hails Dalai Lama. After IPL, United Nations beckons Modi.

There is other side of the coin as well. In fact what provoked the post is Adam Gilchrist’s announcement in Kolkata that says he’s ready to sledge-hammer his former captain Ricky Ponting. Well, Gilly is perfectly entitled to giving vent to his pent-up frustration after being Punter’s deputy for so long. More so because he is through with international cricket and does not care a hoot if that antagonizes Ponting.

But will that be the case with, say an Ishant Sharma and MS Dhoni? I doubt so. Tell me which nitwit would go after his ODI/Test captain and give him a mouthful and still hope for a prolonged international career? Don’t let the foofaraw fox you. At the end of the day -- I would say even at the start of the day too -- IPL is, merely a six-week romp. The bread and butter, fortunately, Test/ ODI cricket.

Image

Who is this imposter in cricket’s garbs?

It was one of those days when you regret working in the sports desk. Calculator was out and eyes glued to television as cricketers, in an unprecedented move, went under the hammer and their high-profile, deep-pocket bidders hammer and tongs.

Mind-boggling figures and strings of never-ending zeroes -- is it the game I claimed to be so familiar with? Or is it actually a garbled annual budget of Mr P Chidambaram, which somehow got leaked? Is not the business desk a better choice to handle the issue?

And finally I found myself confronting the question -- who is this imposter?

Richard Madley, the Dreweatts auctioneer who otherwise specializes in oriental carpet probably did not have an idea of the magnitude of the event. But he can’t be blamed either. See, Ricky Ponting is sulking he went cheap. And the likes of Brendan McCullum can’t stop laughing.

The Indian Premier League auction left me with an awful feeling. Only Paris Hilton could have been more brazen.

When industry is ready to pump in money, resisting the temptation is the actual challenge for the administrators. Succumbing to the lure should not be trumpeted around.

Cricket does need money, to ensure that the Aminis of Papua New Guinea continue to strive for excellence; to help Arjuna Ranatunga at the helm of a cash-strap board to efficiently run the domestic tournaments in Sri Lanka; to make sure that youngsters see a career in cricket.

But if cricket needs money, it needs its aura as well. When a kid picks up the bat or holds the ball fort the first time in his palm, career is a word he would probably misspell and to him, money’s only perceived worth is it can be bartered for a lozenge. More than money, he needs heroes. Heroes who would make grand appearance in his innocent dreams, inspire him to rise above himself and tell him to live his dreams.

Sadly, those who offer their soul under the hammer do not fit into this hero’s role.

Blinded by his Twenty20 vision, Lalit Modi understandably fails to see it but cricket actually got pauper on February 20.

Australia may ban top plays from playing in IPL!

House divided.

That’s Australian cricket beneath the veneer. The Indian Premier League (IPL) moolah has done the seemingly impossible and Australian cricket is grappling with a crisis that threatens to leave the game in tatters Down Under.

The situation became so grave that Cricket Australia, struggling to maintain its authority, warned it might ban top players from playing in the IPL.

It has been an exasperating time for the Australia fans. The cash-rich IPL, BCCI’s ambitious money-milking project, has hit Australian cricket like a hurricane and the result is before us to see.

Andrew Symonds, as if he had not problems enough, now faces disciplinary action for his remarks in an unpublished column. Symonds believes he has a right to earn fast buck and complaints how Cricket Australia was coming in the way.

Ricky Ponting too admits the IPL has become a distraction enough to influence of the team’s performance.

The team looks divided, even though Ponting claimed that his teammates, with the lone exception of Adam Gilchrist, were not concern about IPL.

Ponting’s assertion notwithstanding, the lure of the moolah is too tempting and Ponting himself knows it better. Deep inside, every Australian cricket is craving for the money, which puts Cricket Australia on a tricky wicket.

But the Board does not deserve sympathy, because their predicament is their own making. They have been the partner-in-crime of the Indian cricket board in a venture which treats the game as a mere commodity, its practitioners’ slaves and the followers a bunch of sadists who derive perverse pleasure from a slogathon.

In the coming days, the crisis would only deepen. If Australia has been hit today, tomorrow it might be South Africa’s turn. And some other country the day after.

BCCI has become a monster that is not only usurping ICC’s authority but also scrambling after money, whatever be the cost. Cricket has never looked in more trouble.

The Lesson from Brisbane

One swallow possibly does not make a summer. But then it’s only the dolts who ignore the inklings and miss the obvious.

Agreed, the pathetic batting display in Brisbane in the tri-series opener should not prompt India to reach out for the panic button. But the manner should cost the selectors-- assuming they are a passionate and scrupulous bunch who see their role beyond just penning down 16 names -- their sleep.

Promoting youngsters sound irresistibly sweet, probably too sweet to cloud your commonsense. And investing in youth is a policy that requires certain amount of restraint that has eluded the selectors when they sat to pick India's ODI squad.

Apparently, Dilip Vengsarkar and his colleagues in the selection committee were driven by the doomed idea that packing the team with fresh legs would be a sure-shot formula for success, besides giving the team a refreshing young look. But a cricket match is not won by a team's average age or its look. Skill continues to have the last say and it would remain same in the future too.

So if Sourav Ganguly is a sulking misanthrope at his Behala residence, fair dinkum. But the selectors can be hold responsible for another cricketing felony -- bungling with their handling of the youth.

At a time when the youngsters needed to be guided to the pool, they were simply thrown at the deep end, with a swarm of hungry Australian sharks around to boot.

While Ganguly can consider himself unlucky—even Ricky Ponting was baffled by the southpaw’s exclusion -- the selectors have done a huge disservice to the youngsters as well. It would not be surprising if the likes of Manoj Tiwary returns from Australia with a complex, believing he is just not worth stepping into the bigger shoes of the departing stalwarts like Ganguly.

The Getafix in the selectors have clearly goofed up while concocting the magic potion. They simply forgot to add that vital mix of experience.

Image: AFP

Gilly to go

Adam Gilchrist is about to hang up his gloves. Apparently, dropping VVS Laxman in the Perth Test prompted the decision.

Indeed, he has not been the same intimidating presence either in front or behind the stumps. But still cricket has not seen his kind before.

He has nipped many a bowling career in the bud. His batting in one dayers has been a trauma for pacers and spinners alike. Ricky Ponting, coming at number three, could not stop grinning as he often faced bowlers who had been already beaten to pulp by the swashbuckler southpaw.

And with Gilly behind the stumps – and I’m talking about his salad days – McGraths, Warnes, Gillespies and Lees looked even more formidable. Despite not being in the best of terms with the leggie, Gilly has often been Warne’s partner-in-crime. More batsman have taken the caught-Gilchrist-bowled-Warne way than other available roads to peril.

And not to forget that in the bunch that has been schooled to stand ground and make life difficult for the umpires, Gilly has been a welcome exception, a walker.

Gilly already boasts of more dismissals and tons than any glovesman in the history of the game and Australia might struggle to remain the same force once he departs.

You bungled the job, Colonel!

I have to admit that I had more respect for Dilip Vengsarkar than anyone who laid his bum on the chief selector’s chair in recent past. But to be honest, the Colonel has looked little confused of late and bungled up a sensitive issue.

The decision to sack Sourav Ganguly and Rahul Dravid has been mind-joggling. We indeed need to look beyond the stalwarts and keep the rookies ready to fill the void once they leave the scene. But there has been an unmistakably ugly effort to shove them out of the stage.

As it has been in the vogue of late to ape the Australians, Vengsarkar and his colleagues could have taken a look at the Aussie team, which has Andrew Symonds (33), Brett Lee (31), Stuart Clark (32), Mike Hussey (33), Ricky Ponting (33), Adam Gilchrist (36), Matthew Hayden (36), Brad Hogg (37) and Chris Rodgers (30) -- all in their 30s.

And thanks to their domestic structure, virtually a conveyor belt throwing up new talents every day, Australia apparently is not losing sleep fearing how to manage once the veterans hang up their boots.

While we need to look beyond the Gangulys and the Dravids, I’m not that optimistic about Suresh Rainas, Rohit Sharmas and Robin Uthappa. My cynicism stems from the fact that they have been hanging around for quite a while and behind the Twenty20 veneer, they still have not been able to cement their place in the side. But then, you have to invest in youth, whatever it may cost.

My sole point, however, is that the senior players – considering the service they rendered over the years – have a right to be treated with some sort of dignity, which has been denied in this case.

If the selectors really wanted to show the exit door to the seniors, there could have been dignified ways of doing it. It seems Vengsarkar and his colleagues in the selection committee felt the old horses had outlived their shelf life and hence lead them to the slaughter house to meet the obvious end.

Instead, Vengsarkar could have taken Ganguly and Dravid to a corner, laid his hands around their neck and told them “Guys, we are proud of you for whatever you have done. But time is changing and new guys are knocking on the door. Why don’t you call it quits and walk out head held high? We would host grand benefit matches for you?”

That would have been a befitting ODI send-off for two of India’s greatest servants.

And if the selectors allowed Dhoni and Yuvraj to call the shots, as reports claim, it was unfortunate and I would say Vengsarkar should now have allowed such interference in what is necessarily a selectorial job.

Image

Poor Business, Mr Modi

I think I owe an apology to friends, who were, I guess, sick of listening time and again that Lalit Modi was BCCI’s Man with the Midas Touch. He was a bad investment as far as my hopes are concerned.

I thought this suave, bespectacled, though cocky, Mumbai-based Rajasthan Cricket Association supremo was a mastermind, conceiving one after another marketing ploy to fill in the BCCI coffers.

I thought, he was about to prove himself even better than the man he uprooted in a BCCI coup. It was no mean achievement toppling Jagmohan Dalmiya, who had everyone in the pocket of his safari suit as he ran the Board from his suitcase. Though I was apprehensive if anyone in the new regime could match the wily Kolkata-based Marwari’s business acumen, Modi sort of impressed me.

But my trust proved misplaced. So blind in his effort to take the wind out of Subhas Chandra’s ICL sail, Modi shelled out hell lot of money to rope in the Australians, who would make a fortune even though they would NOT play a single match of the Indian Premier League! Naturally, Ricky Ponting & Co can’t laugh enough.

About 10-12 Aussies would NOT be in a position to play in IPL FOR THE NEXT TWO YEARS because of their international commitment and they would still retain 10 per cent of their fee!

In other words, players like Ponting and Clarke would pocket $100,000 each just lending their name to IPL!

Poor investment by Modi and his comrades in the IPL Governing Council. He has looked like a spoilt child of a millionaire (well he actually is!) who’s on an acquiring spree even though he has no clue whether it’s worth it or not. Again, he actually is so, a failure within a family that owns the Modi Entertainment.

But what really upsets me is that Modi is NOT the pennywise mastermind, the dapper-dollar-dude, the money-minting-machine that he pretends to be. On the contrary, he proved a poor businessman, who ventured and invested in an area without any vision. In fact since Modi & Co took over, all the BCCI deals ran into problems and BCCI has spent half the time in troubleshooting.

I’m not sure whether the money BCCI earns can be called public money. Else, it could have been a huge scam, I guess.

Image: AFP

Take a bow, Jhulan!

So it’s official. Blue Billion, eat your heart out. They maybe demigods back home but the naked truth is the Men in Blue simply do not match up to the best in the business. And you have International Cricket Council (ICC) to vouch for that.

The ICC shortlist for its annual award doesn’t include a single player from the bunch led by Rahul Dravid. However, for India, the lone saving grace is Jhulan Goswami, that beanpole from the women’s team who is in the fray for the Women Cricketer of the Year award.

Australian captain Ricky Ponting is gunning for his second Sir Garfield Sobers Trophy as the Cricketer of the Year, even though the field has ‘former’ Pakistan run-glutton Mohammad Yousuf (who has deserted Pakistan Cricket Board and defected to Indian Cricket League), spin-phobe Kevin Pietersen and West Indian Shivnarine Chanderpaul of the anti-glare-strips-beneath-the-eyes fame.

The initial ICC long list had Zaheer Khan and Anil Kumble in the 'Test Player of the Year' category, while Yuvraj Singh figured in the ODI list. But when ICC announced a pruned up list, the Team India troika could not be sighted there.

Instead, Jhulan shines in company of Lisa Sthalekar (Australia) and Claire Taylor (England) and whether she wins the award or not, she has already stolen a march over her spoilt cousins in the Team India ranks. And for those unfamiliar with her, Jhulan bowls at a steady 120 kmph, slightly better than what a certain Irfan Pathan does these days.

For those who have not seen Jhulan in action, imagine Glenn McGrath undergoing a certain operation and turning up with the cherry in his…er…her…I mean, whatever, hand. The same, smooth run-up and the ability to land the ball on its seam delivery after delivery.

Jhulan was India’s vice captain in last year’s tour of England and left serious psychological dent in the opponent camp with her scorching pace. Thanks to her show, her side won the Test series there, and she the Player of the Series award.

So while we gloat and bloat over Dravid’s men’s comeback in the ODI series, spare a thought for Jhulan and take our hats off.

ICC Shortlist:

Cricketer of the Year: Shivnarine Chanderpaul (WI), Kevin Pietersen (Eng) ,Ricky Ponting (Aus) Mohammed Yousuf (Pak)

Test Player: Muttiah Muralitharan (SL), Kevin Pietersen (Eng), Ricky Ponting (Aus) , Mohammad Yousuf (Pak)

ODI Player: Matthew Hayden (Aus), Jacques Kallis (SA), Glenn McGrath (Aus), Ricky Ponting (Aus)

Emerging Player: Ravinder Bopara (Eng), Shakib Al Hasan (Bang), Shaun Tait (Aus), Ross Taylor (NZ)

Captain of the Year: Mahela Jayawardene (SL), Ricky Ponting (Aus)

Associate ODI Player of the Year: Ashish Bagai (Can), Thomas Odoyo (Ken), Ryan ten Doeschate (Neth), Steve Tikolo (Ken)

Umpire of the Year: Mark Benson, Steve Bucknor, Simon Taufel

Women's Cricketer of the Year: Jhulan Goswami (Ind), Lisa Sthalekar (Aus), Claire Taylor (Eng)

Image: Touchline Photo

Team India coach: Much ado about nothing

When Shane Warne said the only coach he needed was the vehicle that took the team from hotel to ground, he was not just taking a swipe at John Buchanan. It was actually an Ian Chappell chesnut and the brouhaha over Team India's new coach has again irked Chappelli.

Chappell warns India should not simply crush the new coach with the burden of expectations. A reneissance can come only via "proud and spirited players" led by a "strong coach", he asserts.

Sanjay Manjrekar, one of the rare sane voice in the mad melee, harps on the same issue. Coach has a very limited role to play and it's the players who would have to go out and actually play.

I think Greg Chappell's tenure proved the point beyond doubt. Chappell exceeded brief and encouraged by the coy captain in Rahul Dravid, he became larger than the coach. And it clearly backfired.

Chappell was calling the shots in each and every aspect and Dravid's diminishing stature, especially among the senior teammates, undermined his authority. Chappell did tried some new ideas but his growing stature came in the way of its fruition.

Chappell succeeded in convincing Irfan Pathan that he could bat. And every time Irfan scored, Chappell got unfair share of the kudos. By that time, the coach had outgrown the players, and it was never going to augur well for Team India.

Ian Chappell cries hoars to convince us that coach's can be instrumental behind a revival of fortune but they can't be the instrument. He cited the best example of John Buchanan.

Buchanan's exit did not make Australia a weaker side but if Ricky Ponting is not able to skipper the side, it would well create a problem, he said.

BCCI roped in Chandu Borde to prolong the stop-gap arrangement first made for the Bangladesh tour. Hoping the septuagenarian to free Team India of all its ills would be unfair and brickbats or bouquets -- depending on how the side fare in England -- should be addressed to Dravid and Co. only.

Image: PTI

Only if it could silence the guns…

(Can they apply balm to the war wounds with a win tomorrow?)

Hours before the final showdown, Ricky Ponting has expectedly initiated the psychological warfare.

“If Barbados has the pace and bounce it had for the last couple of games, it should play into our hands beautifully,” Punter thundered, hinting he would unleash his pace battery on a lively Barbados track to bounce out the Lankans.

Glenn McGrath too joined the skirmish before the war. The Pigeon has scalped Sanath Jayasuriya seven times in his career and he wants him one last time tomorrow.

"In Australia I have always been reasonably successful against him, and I think the bounce has nicked him out quite a few times," Pigeon squeaked. Again, this was expected. McGrath has always been fond of such pre-match banter.

What was not really expected was Sanath Jayasuriya, that Matara Marauder, matching Punter and Pigeon decibel for decibel.

“'It doesn't matter what they bowl to me. I have been around long enough in international cricket to face any sort of bowling-if they bounce me, I can pull and hook as well… It's not as if we haven't played on bouncier pitches," Jayasuriya replied.

But all these rhetoric and saber-rattling seem irrelevant, even vulgar, when Muttiah Muralitharan takes a broad view and says he wants to win the cup to help his strife-torn countrymen forget, even if for a few hours, their troubled times.

"It would be a bigger achievement than all my personal records…It will act as an inspiration for youngsters and we being a team of different nationalities, it could also help tide over the problems our nation faces.

"We are going through a bad situation in our country but this could achieve something different," said Murali, a minority Tamil player. In fact the current squad has a Sinhala Buddhist in Jayasuriya, a Sinhala catholic in Chaminda Vaas, a Muslim in Farveez Maharoof and also a Tamil Catholic in Russel Arnold. Cricket has shown in Sri Lanka what it is capable of and that’s the best part of the game.

For a change, the LTTE Tigers have remote control in their hands not to explode a mine, but just to switch on innocuous TV sets in their hideouts; for once, they would acknowledge Jayasuriya, and not a certain Velupillai Prabhakaran, is the real Master Blaster.

Now if one more World Cup triumph could have silenced all the guns in this teardrop island in the Indian Ocean, I guess even a title-hungry Ponting would not mind losing for once. May the deserving team win tomorrow’s World Cup final.