Dale Steyn, Steve Irwin reincarnated

Not that I liked Steve Irwin. It's not because I champion crocodiles' right to privacy so blatantly breached, on-camera, by the motormouth Croc Hunter in his pomp. Germaine Greer had a problem with that (a must-read piece for whoever cares for nature) and she clearly didn't shed crocodile tears after a stingray – otherwise as harmless as Ajantha Mendis has been to India in the recent ODI series - stung Steve to death.

I was rather more haunted by a photo of a number of mutilated stingrays scattered on a Queensland beach, a backlash by the Croc Hunter's admirers.

The only thing I remember about Steve's wife Terri is that she once invited Britney Spears to join her and her daughter in some Australian bush to get over the multiple personality disorder that was troubling the pop star.

Their daughter Bindi, like her father, proved a smart kid and effortlessly stepped into Steve’s shoes to become a celebrity TV show host. Much to Michael Clarke's chagrin, the showbiz prodigy went on to replace Pup's girl friend Lara Bingle as the new face for Australian Tourism!

The only more precocious child I can think of is Alfie Patten, who became a father at 13 somewhere in East Sussex last week.

Well, before the foreword gets bigger than the book itself, let me announce that legions of Croc Hunter fans can now rejoice.

Confirmation comes that Dale Steyn is actually Steve Irwin reincarnated.

When the rest of the world was deriving sadistic pleasure from Australia's misery, Steyn felt he didn't have time to waste. And what better way to prepare for a home series against Australia than wrestling with crocodiles?

Pix: Getty Images

Of liver cancer, stupid cupid and Knight Riders

Sourav Ganguly can’t be faulted if he looks a sulking misanthrope. And as if the Kolkata Knight Riders didn’t have problem enough.

Already depleted by the exit of Ricky Ponting (so what if he forgot to put bat to ball) and Brendon McCullum (so what if he sizzled only to fizzle subsequently), Shahrukh Khan and Ganguly hurriedly roped in Brad Hodge for his well-documented Twenty20 prowess. But call it quirk of fate, the hitherto-out-of-favour Hodge also gets an SOS to forget IPL and join the Australian squad in West Indies as shadow for a cupid-struck Michael Clarke.

Reports say though Clarke’s father is fighting Hodgkin's disease, it’s the condition of his fiancée Lara Bingle’s father, who is battling a liver cancer, that prompted the Australian vice captain to stay back. Well, while that may fetch Clarke a nomination for the inaugural ICC Lover of the Year 2008 award, I doubt it does not win him a friend in Ganguly.

Tourism Australia had Lara as its face till the slew of scandals forced them to replace her with Croc-Hunter Steve Irwin’s daughter Bindi. Lara featured in the 2006 campaign “So where the bloody hell are you?”

Ganguly was last seen wielding his bat and searching for the stupid cupid, mouthing the line he borrowed from the campaign.

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