Monday, 26 October 2009

Why it’s not easy being an Oz cricketer


Because one fine morning, your boss may feel it's not enough to have just Darrel Hair and demand facial hair!

Reason?

A fathead, disheveled boffin – jumping up and down Jolimont Street claiming to be Archimedes 2.0 – has concocted the outrageous hypothesis that .22 yard of undergrowth beneath your nose guarantees success on the 22 yards!

And it's just the tip of the iceberg. Shane Watsons and Mitchell Johnsons would vouch, worse can happen to you.

For instance, you can jolly well be plucked out of the nets and planted in dingy studios to strip down to the bare minimum and allow strange people scrub you and rub smelly ointments.

Enough to sow the seed of doubt that you are actually a 40-over old cherry, being polished for that dirty trick of reverse swing!

And the worst is not over yet.

Your boss then decides to immortalize your dishevelment and market the remnants of your modesty, capturing your embarrassment into calendars that would soon adorn the walls of girls' hostel and shady gay clubs across the nation.

So where were we? Yes, it's not easy being an Oz cricketer. Especially when your boss had attended the same morality school frequented by sleaze racketeers.

(Buy Men of Cricket Calendar 2010 here).

18 comments:

namya said...

I hope Pup is not on that calendar :)

Som said...

Namya, I saw Pup and Lara Bingle in another sumptuous commercial.

straight point said...

one can easily understand why pup's having back problem... he has to take bing(l)e so often... :)

namya said...

Som,

Pup half naked will not be a pretty sight

Som said...

SP, imagine Lara Bingle on a Piggyride...I mean Puppyride:

Som said...

Namya, have a look at the link:

http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/people/bingle-and-clarke-set-to-brand-it-like-beckham-20091013-guzd.html

BoomBoomCricket said...

Hi there. Please comment on my Pakistani cricket blog and I should do the same on yours.

Som said...

BBC, didn't know Afridi runs a cricket blog too! He said he already had so much no plate that he had to stop playing Test!

Christopher Poshin David said...

Don't worry Pup and Lee are missing much to the bewilderment of the Aussie fans....

Som said...

CPD, Lee would do it for an Indian fashion designer. Just heard he has become brand ambassador of P7 news channel!!!

Sidthegnomenator said...

No Lee or Clarke, I'm afraid, but we are blessed with hte pot belly of Hopes and the moobs of Hauritz ...

scary

Naked Cricket said...

A family blog indeed. Next the Under 15 calendar.

Som said...

Sidthegnomenator, that would make another calendar which could be of immense use during interrogation of hardened criminals.

Som said...

NC, you push me into introspection!

scorpicity said...

I heard Mark Nicholas pre-ordered all copies of that calendar.

Som said...

Scorpi, Mark Nicholas is surely not alone.

Sidthegnomenator said...

I've just followed the link in that post, which takes you to an article that says:

"Nathan Bracken, Mitchell Johnson, Simon Katich, Shane Watson and Shuan Tait will be drooled over by women" or something like that - no one drooling over Hauritz, Hopes or Geeves than?

Som said...

Sidthegnomenator, you hit the nail on the head. With Johson, Tait and Watto around, did Hauritz, Hopes or Geeves stood any chance in the first place?