Friday, 8 July 2011

Cricket's Alternative Food Movement

Was it only my TV set that showed Djokovic sinking to his knees, plucking a few blades of grass and putting it in mouth after taming Nadal at Wimbledon?

It seemed an honest, pioneering effort by a tennis player of no uncertain scientific bend of mind to find out the edibility of grass and see if it can be the answer to the global food crisis.

Taking a cue from Djokovic, Doosra prepares a list of cricket’s own bizarre biters, eerie eaters, champion chewers and leading lickers:

1. Shahid Afridi: A ball-biter par excellence;

2. Mohd Asif: Single largest importer of poppy seeds;

3. Sourav Ganguly: Human Nail-Clipper. Mad enough, at his pomp, to chew nails and spit rivets;

4. Ewen Chatfield: A unique swallower of his own tongue;

5. Lalit Modi: A reckless biter but limited chewer;

6. Harbhajan Singh: Premium finger-licker;

7. ICC: A steady eater, out of BCCI’s hands.

P.S. Would be unfair to put up the shutters without a word about Kamran Akmal, held as the most promising of all. Even jealous teammates admit he’s so endowed that Akmal can start a bat-manufacturing business rightway without buying a chainsaw.

16 comments:

Govind Raj said...

How about Mike Tyson ?

He had an eye for the ear ! Right ?

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thoughtsfromthedustbin.com said...

Personally, I find I can't go a week without making fun of Shane Warne the pie-eater but I do like your #1 - that still blows my mind. What was he thinking?

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raj said...

How about humble pie? Ian Chappell had it twice in recent years - once served from the kitchen of master chef SRT, and the other from your alternative food champion Afridi in the recent world cup.
English newspaper men notably Mike Atherton were recently served the same dish by Alastair Cook.

Seems quite a popular dish in Cricketing circles, no?

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Som said...

Govind, sincerely thinking of stretching the scope of the blog beyond just cricket to accommodate the Tysons!

Som said...

Thoughts...I don't think he was thinking. He just went with the flow. had Afridi been Newton, there would not be any theory of gravitational force, for he would have eaten the apple without bothering about anything else.

Som said...

Raj, you hit the nail on the head. Humble-pit must rank among the most popular dish in cricket :) Welcome to Doosra by the way.

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greyblazer said...

Andy Caddick eating humble pie at Durban in 03 WC. He kept talking about how he will bounce out SRT in the 03 WC but saw one of his bouncers being hooked for a huge six.

Som said...

Greyblazer, wonder how many ate those and who supplied those. McGrath the Nostradamus springs to lip for his 2005 Ashes prediction :)

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