Sunday, 19 December 2010

7 Reasons why China Will Do Well in Cricket

1. First and foremost, they would have the largest gathering of Chinaman bowlers, beat that!

2. Javed Miandad has been teaching them cricket ethics and spirit of the game;

3. China possess a wall more impregnable than Rahul Dravid;

4. Ages of ping-pong practice means even their No. 11 batter would have the sharp hand-eye coordination of a Sehwag;

5. The outside world would have to depend solely on Xinhua for results, which effectively means the world would know only what the on-duty Xinhua editor wants it to know;

6. Cheap Chinese products would be a serious distraction for tourists, especially when fielding. Plans are afoot to set up boundary line kiosks in all major stadiums;

7. I have been to Beijing Olympics and can tell you that China can both prevent and make rain. So while a Dhoni or a Ponting, at best, can pray for rain, their Chinese counterpart would have access to a technology which would be handy on the fifth day of a precarious Test.

12 comments:

Govind Raj said...

And how about...

Pitches that crumble only when Opponents bat ?

Fielders who can pick up catches from anywhere and everywhere thanks to their agility beyond any race or people of the planet ?

And most importantly...

All of them look so similar, their Best Batsman can continue to play 3 - 4 times in an innings. Even if he gets out, he can come back fresh after the fall of next wicket because nobody on earth will be able to tell one China-man from another !

Ominous Som Ominous for India ! The only field other than English language is fast crumbling !

Som said...

Goving, the last point you made was dangerous. Imagine Sehwag coming down to bat three times every innings!

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Govind Raj said...

Som, But Sehwag is not a Chinaman !

And one relief for all bowlers of the world...

In his own style...

Ek hee Sehwag hai !

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Som said...

Govind, actually not a bad idea if ICC makes cricket a 10-a-side affair and one batter would get two chances. Fielding would have more gap, hence more runs!

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Net Run Rate said...

If China enters properly in Cricket, they can also help getting Cricket in Olympics, isnt it?

Som said...

NRR, bang on. India clearly doesn't want cricket to become an Olympic sport. They didn't even bother to send a team to Asian Games!

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