Wednesday 2 July 2008

Mayhem at Mannofield Park


The publishing industry is abuzz and grapevine has it that ICC fountainheads Ray Mali, David Morgan and Sharad Pawar are burning midnight oil, co-authoring “101 Sure Shot Ways to Kill One Day Cricket”.

How else you explain pitting an unsuspecting Liliput against the big Brobdingnag bully resulting in the ugliest mismatch in one day cricket’s history? And if this is how ICC envisages the associates improving, Mali & Co should at once be put through the SCAN.

Trust me, boxing – at least amateur boxing -- may look a gory sport but it’s more humane. You don’t see a flyweight pugilist hurled into the ring to be easy meat for his super heavyweight candidate. And then there also is this provision of RSC or Referee Stops Contest when it becomes mockery of a bout.

But then cricket is a different proposition, a different BALL game altogether. Licensed to overkill, bobblehead ICC nods in affirmative whenever an ODI tournament is proposed and the Mannofield Park massacre also reveals its criminal indifference to the associate members’ future.

Tip-toeing in its cricket infancy, all Ireland needed was to be guided to the pool. Instead, they were thrown into the deepest end, with a hungry shoal of sharks waiting for a feast. Poor Irish bowlers must have been shaking and shrinking in their boots when the McCullum-Marshall-Taylor trio was setting the ball on orbits, posing serious security hazard for the low-flying ScotAirways planes.

If ICC still claims to care for its associate members, it should engage shrinks to help the Irish players come out of the trauma.

What baffles me is ICC’s adamance not to learn the lesson from its Bangladesh experience and persisting with the same logic-defying rush to elevate the associates despite the obvious counter-productive outcome. I won’t be surprised if Kyle McCallan and his boys develop an inferiority complex, convinced of their inability to break into and hang around in the big league.

Meanwhile for ODIs, IPL has already done enough to put it on the deathbed. ICC surely can’t wait to administer the last rites.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

There's more to come too, since after a day's rest, New Zealand come up against the 'might' of Scotland.

Though from an English perspective, I'm glad Brendon McCullum waited until now to get into form.

Som said...

Dave, I'm worried by the time the tourney is over, Irish and Scot bowlers might have changed their vocation altogether.

straight point said...

i will miss ODIs...

cdak said...

You're spot on. Why on earth would they let what is at best our second, possibly even third eleven play a team that just marmelised england? All our good players either now are becoming (or have become) England qualified or have county commitments or are injured. Not the time for this game at all!

Anonymous said...

since i have allready commented same on other blogs would comment one more time.

ICC should not do jokes and joking.
The matches between the top 10 and top 100 must be divided with row.
I think it would be better that Ireland and other play matches against norway, kenya, nepal and so on.

Irish are trying to give a new shape with confidence and such matches with detior their confidence and performance both.

SO finally put a distinct line between the matches between top 10 and top 100 if ICC really wants any other team to enter top 10.

Should we not ban Bangladesh and Zimbabwe who are under performer for last couple of years. They have not even improved. (Ya, they do give shocks to other big teams when big teams try to laugh on them).

Anonymous said...

Threat to the low-altitude flights! Beautifully said. I didn't watch the match, but was shocked to see the scorecard. This is insane - but what else does one expect from cricket boards?

Anonymous said...

whatever gets the money in...thats the attitude of all business pundits these days...unfortunately...our beloved game has become a victim of the same....

I see a bleak future of the traditional game....its like killing the duck to get all the golden eggs at once...but then the duck is dead...

Som said...

SP, I'll also miss the ODIs...those were the days...

Som said...

Cdak, welcome on board. None gains from such mismatches, not even the winners. McCullum and Marshalls would only develop inflated ego and probably some bragging rights, that's it.

Adding you to my blogroll.

Som said...

Cricketgod, I think ICC can do with a relegation/promotion system among Full Members and Associates. If B'desh/Zimbabwe does not perform upto expectations, they can drop down, allowing, say, Ireland or Canada take their place and play limited number of games at the highest level.

Som said...

VM, high time bloggers run the boards, no?

Som said...

UTP, welcome here. Unfortunately, cricket administrators have not apparently read that Duck-tale. They have grabbed the golden goose and looking for the knife. God bless cricket.

Anonymous said...

SP really ODI's will not be missed be me.

Anyway Som, you are correct. I allready told those who underform put them out of top 10 and include some other team.

For better future of team which doesn't belongs to top 10 must be prepared to host the matches between other teams. Atleast their people will come to know about cricket.

So better host matches at Canada, Norway, Spain, Germany, Ireland, USA, mexico and so on. This will boost the ppl knowing cricket there and they will try to popularise this game otherwise as i told the days will longer be away when cricket would be like Sanskrit(oldest language but it was not spread by their origin to others)which is oldest but least popularised

Anonymous said...

cricketgod, spot on. cricket needs to expand the horizon and reach out to new audience and this was the logic behind Twenty20 as well.

Anonymous said...

I will not really miss ODI's

;)

Som said...

Ankit, same here.

Anonymous said...

I miss the days when we were getting beaten black and blue by the windies... am being sadistic... i enjoyed the hammering.

Anonymous said...

Scorpi...I think we never mind being thrashed by the Windies. Largely because they were graceful in win and gracious in occasional defeats. They were popular champions, unlike the Aussies.