10 Unknown Quotes!

Being at the right place at the right time is something that comes naturally to Doosra.

Inevitably, that makes one privy to mutterings that otherwise would never reach civilisation.

Following are the 10 unknown quotes, the veracity of which can effortlessly be established simply by trusting this blog.

1. "Don ko pakadna mushkil hi nahi, na mumkin bhi hai." - Harold Larwood. The line that prompted Douglas Jardine to conceive Bodyline;

2. "Main aur meri tanhai aksar yeh baatein kartein hain..." - Robinson Crusoe.

3. "Give this ring to Sita and get her signature on this receipt"- Lord Rama to Hanuman.

4. "Kripya ladies seat me na baithe."- Noah on board his Ark.

5. "Salaa aaj hi stepney lanaa bhool gaya!" - Karna at Kurukshetra.

6. "Single? Ready to mingle?" - Surpanakha to Lakshman.

7. "Can't believe landed on Moon! Dude, how long is the bar open?" - Neil Armstrong.

8. "Sorry I didn't tell you Tenzing that I got vertigo. Hold me tight please!" - Edmund Hillary.

9. "Nomoshkar...Ek Minute!" - John Wilkes Booth to Abraham Lincoln.

10. "No comments." – Navjot Singh Sidhu.

Poverty Line, National Drink and MSA

Doosra has accessed documents that confirm our worst fears.

That MSA worked in the package labeling industry in his previous life.

Worse, he can’t get over the hangover!

When he gets bored by the dull interior of the ghastly Planning Commission office, MSA scribbles something on a piece of paper and, like a man possessed, sticks it to the first thing he lays his hands on.

Last month, the office oddjobber pushed the door and was about to enter MSA’s chamber with his lunch before being stopped by a rope tied at chest high.

Here’s what followed:

Boy: Sir, what is this? Which idiot tied this rope?

MSA: I did that.

Boy: Err...ok...nice sir. But why?

MSA: Look at it carefully. Can you tell me what is this?

Boy: Looks just a stinking rope. Yes! It was lying near gate and still has the stains of Guptaji’s paan. I saw him spitting on it.

MSA: Moron! This is Poverty Line!

Boy: What line? No idea what are you blabbering. Must be because you are hungry. Remove the rope sir. Let me come in and serve your lunch.

MSA: Wait a second. The dilemma is how to come in. Well, how much you earned today?

Boy: Why sir?

MSA: If you earn more than Rs 28, you have to jump and clear the rope.

Boy: If not?

MSA: In that case, you have to crawl under it.

Boy: Let me count...5...10...I earned Rs 28.50 sir.

MSA: Wow! That’s above Poverty Line. So, go three steps back and leap over the rope.

Boy: As you say. Here I come siiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrr...(thud, splash!)

MSA: Yuck! What is this! You spoiled the carpet, my desk and my cloth!

Boy: I would have entered and served it on your table sir but then you insisted...

MSA: You moron! Get lost! Well, hold on, get me a National Drink before that.

Boy: What! You want to drink in office!

MSA: Damn it! Who gave you the job? Don’t you know tea is the National Drink?

Boy: And me?

MSA: You are the National Moron!

Boy: (Sotto voce) And you are national...

MSA: What?

Boy: Nothing sir. Getting your tea.

Random Thoughts on Pune-Punjab IPL Match

* This headband of Ashok Dinda. Reliably told it can only be surgically removed.

* Still intrigued by the Jesse Ryder run-out. Why didn't Sourav Ganguly leave crease? Was he afraid some lady might just grab it?

* 3-ball duck. Manish Pandey's appearance was shorter than Chunky Pandey's in Don.

* Ashish Nehra flashes a smile. You can call Pune Warriors India anything but just not toothless.

* Did Angelo Mathews mistake Harmeet Singh for the delivery boy from Tehal Singh's Dhaba and got foxed?

* Mithun Manhas-Piyush Chawla yawnfest....would rather see "Shatranj". Mithun-Juhi Chawla.

* Ironically, Pune innings so far resembles King's XI co-owner Preity Zinta's career. Few hits.

* If Sourav Ganguly's run-out victims are coaxed into forming a human chain, it will reach Eden Gardens from Behala. #

* Sourav Ganguly looks pregnant...with ideas of course.

* 4 DOTS in first over. Praveen Kumar could have been effective in TB control as well.